I have given up many crazy things in the past years but this year was hard for us to think of things to "give up" this year for Lent. We have always been pretty healthy but had a few areas that could be "tweaked." But this year, we have made a big effort to overhaul the unhealthy and it took effect long before Lent and I sure want our new habits to stick with us long after Easter. So I decided to look within myself.
I think some things people say are out of habit as well as just conversation. I also believe that you can can get "stuck" in a mind set that also drives these conversations. With everything that has been going on, I have tried my best to have a positive attitude but I think all my energy and effort went there! So now I have found myself being a big complainer. I work in an atmosphere where majority of my patients complain about something--the nursing home life, food, the news, etc--, also Medicare has been constantly changing putting constraints on my profession that make it difficult at times to remember why I do what I do. I was feeding off all this complaining. But That's just part of it. I complain about the weather, food, politics, you name it and I feel like I couldn't say a nice thing about it!! So I decided to just stop. I am going to try my hardest to not complain for the next 40 days in hopes that this will give me a new outlook on things other than just my health. Day 1 was a major challenge and I have had to catch myself ALOT :) but I am sticking with it. It has now been 5 days and I can tell a HUGE difference in just a few things I would normally repeatedly say throughout the day, "I'm so tired", "I hate the rain!" etc. Even though it has been challenging, I can definitely say it has been refreshing!
****MD Anderson Update****
This has been my biggest challenge to stay positive about the last few days! I heard from them Thursday as they tried to set up my appointment with the endocrinology team. I kindly told them that I have no need for an endocrinology team, I have that here. They said for "thyroid cancer." I also reminded them that if it was indeed "thyroid cancer" than it was a lymphoma. So I was then referred to the Lymphoma team. They could not set up an appointment for me because I did not have a DEFINITE lymphoma diagnosis only a high probability. I said yes we knew that and that is the whole reason for me coming to MD Anderson. I have now had 4 biopsies that have each been read by 2 hospitals and the only ones that agree was that there was no lymphoma cells in my bone marrow. The others all conflicted with each other. It was referred to the medical director. I then received a call from pathology and now they have decided to have my actual biopsy slides shipped to MD Anderson clinic and be read by their path team. So now I am a patient of the "suspicion of cancer" clinic. I am thankful for this mix up :) (give me some credit for trying!!) I think this will save a us a few wasted appointments when we get to Houston. Hopefully, we will get an appointment for sometime in the next few weeks. The were aiming for next week but we are hoping for early March. Will keep y'all updated!
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